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As an NRI, the emotional and logistical challenges of caring for elderly parents in India can be overwhelming, especially when dementia enters the picture. Whether it’s Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s, both diseases rob families of the relationships they once knew, leaving behind worry, guilt, and a mountain of difficult decisions to make. Living abroad while watching your parent’s condition deteriorate adds layers of helplessness and fear.
Dementia, by its nature, is progressive, and although there are treatments to manage symptoms, there is no cure. The journey becomes about managing decline and preserving quality of life. For those far away, the challenges seem tenfold—what if something happens when you're not there? Who will check in? How do you ensure their medication is taken on time? And, perhaps the most heart-wrenching questions of all: Are they lonely? Are they forgetting to take care of themselves in the most basic of ways?
In this blog, we’ll explore the emotional toll of being an NRI with parents suffering from dementia, the practical challenges involved in their care, and the myriad solutions that must be considered for their safety and well-being. Finally, we’ll look at how a healthcare concierge service like Nila can be a lifeline during this difficult time, helping families manage the complex web of care from a distance.
As a child, nothing prepares you for watching your parents lose themselves. Dementia doesn’t just affect memory; it changes personalities, behaviors, communication abilities and can affect movement and mobility to a great extent. And when you're living abroad, these changes can be stark and devastating to observe.
Guilt is a constant companion for NRIs in this situation. You might feel guilty for pursuing your career abroad, for starting your own family miles away, and for not being physically present during your parents’ toughest times. Even though rationally, you know that life takes people in different directions, emotionally, it’s harder to adjust to the fact of not being there in person.
Worry follows right behind guilt. Is your mom wandering off? Did your dad forget to take his medication today? Are they eating properly? Are they safe? Are they lonely? It’s difficult enough to navigate dementia when you’re close by, but from a different time zone, it can feel like your worst nightmare.
And then there’s the helplessness. Knowing your parent is confused, scared, or even in danger, and not being able to rush to their side, makes the situation unbearable at times. You want to be a hands-on caregiver, but distance makes that impossible. This might result in multiple unplanned or even planned trips to and fro, which can take a toll on you, both financially and emotionally.
When it comes to dementia, the practical side of care is just as daunting as the emotional aspect. Dementia is unpredictable; it might start with mild forgetfulness but can rapidly progress to a stage where your parent may no longer recognize you, manage daily activities, or even speak coherently.
For NRIs, these changes can be difficult to gauge from afar, and managing care remotely becomes a complex puzzle.
Parents with dementia often need constant supervision, depending on the stage of dementia they are experiencing. They may forget to lock the door, wander into dangerous situations, or accidentally harm themselves while cooking or doing basic tasks. For someone thousands of miles away, ensuring their safety is a constant source of anxiety.
Many dementia patients need medication to help manage symptoms. However, remembering to take medicine is particularly challenging for those with Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s. Missed doses or incorrect consumption can lead to medical emergencies. Coordinating medication management from a different country becomes a logistical nightmare, especially when time zones and distance factor in.
Even if you're able to visit periodically, long-term care is a different matter altogether. The healthcare landscape in India is complex, especially in large tier 1s such as , with varied standards across cities and even within the same city. You may need to arrange for a home nurse, physiotherapist, or even regular doctor visits—but finding trusted, reliable professionals remotely can be a monumental task.
Dementia patients, particularly in the mid-to-late stages, often suffer from feelings of isolation. While family members are their primary emotional support, many NRIs are forced to confront the reality that they can’t be present to fill this role. The resulting loneliness can exacerbate dementia symptoms, and there’s the ever-present fear that their mental health may deteriorate faster without proper social engagement.
Emergencies, unfortunately, come without warning. With dementia, the risks are heightened, as elderly parents may fall, forget crucial details like how to call for help, or leave the stove on, leading to accidents. From thousands of miles away, it’s impossible to react as quickly as you would want to.
Caring for a parent with dementia from abroad requires a well-planned safety net. Several solutions can help manage the situation, each addressing different aspects of care.
1. Professional Home Care
One of the most reliable options is hiring professional home care services. Trained caregivers can provide constant supervision, assist with daily activities, and monitor the progression of dementia. They can ensure that medications are taken on time, meals are prepared safely, and your parent is engaging in mentally stimulating activities.
2. Medical Attention and Physiotherapy at Home
Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s both come with physical challenges. Many patients lose mobility and require regular physiotherapy. For Parkinson’s patients, tremors and stiffness make daily life more difficult. Arranging for physiotherapy and medical check-ups at home ensures that your parents can receive the care they need without the confusion or stress of hospital visits.
3. Safety Measures in the Home
Simple modifications can make a huge difference in your parents' safety. Installing cameras, smart locks, motion sensors, and medical alert systems can give you peace of mind. These measures help create a safer environment and allow you to check in remotely.
4. Companionship Services
Loneliness is one of the most significant challenges for dementia patients. Engaging a companion service for regular visits or even a part-time live-in companion can provide the emotional support your parents need. Companions can play games, read, or simply offer conversation to keep your parents socially active.
5. Healthcare Concierge Services
Managing everything from a distance is still incredibly challenging, even with the best solutions in place. A healthcare concierge service like Nila can act as a single point of contact for managing care. From ensuring regular check-ins to coordinating with doctors, companions, and emergency responders, concierge services provide families with peace of mind by acting as their eyes and ears on the ground.
Nila offers a comprehensive approach to managing dementia care for elderly parents in India. As an NRI, you need more than just piecemeal solutions—you need an organized system that you can trust to be there when you can’t.
Here’s how Nila helps:
Regular Check-ins: Whether your parent needs someone to stop by few times a month, Nila ensures that someone is always looking out for them. The team reports back to you, giving you the confidence that your parent is in good hands, without intruding on your parents independence. The team will also check-in via phone calls a few times a week to pre-empt any concerns.
Medication Management: Nila can help by ensuring that medications are taken on time and in the correct dosages, reducing the risk of medical emergencies caused by missed or incorrect medication. We do this by putting in place regular reminders, organizing medication in boxes and monitoring these from time to time and making in-person or over-the-phone check ins. Through a combination of methods, we ensure adequate oversight on medication management.
Companionship and Emotional Support: Nila's companions are trained to engage with dementia patients in meaningful ways, offering social interaction that keeps your parent engaged and mentally stimulated. Each care manager is also trained to understand unspoken cues or concerns and are empowered to raise the concern.
Coordinating Assisted Care: From hiring home nurses to organizing medical visits and physiotherapy, Nila takes the burden of logistics off your shoulders, allowing you to focus on being present for your parent emotionally, even if you are physically far away.
Emergency Support: In case of an emergency, Nila acts swiftly at any time of the day or night, coordinating immediate responses and keeping you informed every step of the way. Knowing that someone is there for your parent during critical moments gives you peace of mind.
Caring for a parent with dementia is never easy, and doing so from abroad presents unique emotional and practical challenges. The fear, guilt, and helplessness can weigh heavily on NRIs, but solutions do exist to manage the complexity of dementia care.
With the right support network—including professional home care, safety measures, and services like Nila—you can ensure that your parent receives the best possible care while you continue to manage your life abroad. Nila’s role as a healthcare concierge can be a lifeline, offering peace of mind, knowing that your parent is safe, cared for, and never alone in their journey through dementia.
